Does one run a Gazelle make?

I’m a serious recreational runner, which is an oxymoron used by those who have no hopes of running professionally, but still consider it as much a regular part of their lives as brushing their teeth, or flushing the toilet (only much more enjoyable). So yeah, that’s me. I am, therefore I run. For the past six months though, I’ve been… not struggling with my running, exactly, but not progressing. I’ve been stuck at casual runner level, farting about on three to five mile runs a few days a week at a really slow pace, with some seven to ten mile long runs on the weekends, and it has made me feel like Hypoactive Toad. Or Hypoactive Slug. It’s been frustrating; a far cry from where I want to be. I'll never be Speedy Gonzales, but I know I can do a lot better than Hypoactive Slug. So I decided I needed a kick in the pants.

Austin is blessed with being a fit and active city with a large running community, and as such it has a number of really good running programs. The one I decided I would use to kick me in the persqueeter is Gilbert’s Gazelles. Gilbert’s Gazelles is coached by – you guessed it – Gilbert, who is an elite athlete, running icon, and local celebrity. His story is both horrific and inspirational. He came from the African country of Burundi, where he became a victim of the conflict between the Hutus and the Tutsis. One day when he was at school, Hutus forced Tutsi students and teachers into a room, and set about hacking them with machetes. They were then doused with gasoline and set on fire. The only survivor was Gilbert. Somehow he managed to come out of it with his spirit intact, and is just as renowned in the local running community for his generosity and big heart as he is for his talent as a runner. And he is definitely talented. Many people at his level only coach elite athletes, but he chooses to coach not only the super fast, but slowpokes like me. Blessed indeed. By the way, I highly recommend his book, This Voice in My Heart: A Runner's Memoir of Genocide, Faith, and Forgiveness. It's a great read, and you don't have to be a runner to appreciate his story.

I had my first workout with the Gazelles this morning, and I arrived feeling a bit trepidatious -- newness, uncertainty, and all that. I introduced myself to Gilbert, and he told me what the group would be doing. “Do you think you can do that?” he asked. “Uhhhh…” A friend of mine jumped in and told him what my longest distance runs have been. Gilbert spoke. No seven-mile tempo run for me! Off I went to join the beginner’s group. It’s not about where you’ve been: it’s about where you are.

The beginner’s workout consisted of a two-mile warm up, drills, and a two-mile tempo run. For those unfamiliar with running drills, I’ll explain them to you. There are crossovers, where you run sideways while putting the trailing leg alternately behind and in front of the leading one. The goal of these is to not to trip over your own feet. You also skip, the purpose of which is to release your inner child. There’s backwards running, where you try not to run into things. With butt kicks, you literally kick yourself in the ass. I can kick my right butt cheek, but not the left. Apparently my ability to self-flagellate is half-assed. There are also strides, where you run fast but relaxed over a short distance of a hundred meters or so. You’re supposed to do these at your own pace, but secretly you’re trying to beat the person next to you. Anyone who says otherwise is lying. Except me. Drills will make you better… stronger… faster. But not bionic.

I loved the run, and felt great when I was done. It was awesome, and fun, and everything I’ve been missing about running. I'm happy to have the camaraderie of a group, and the structure of a coached workout again; running is one of few areas where I like being told what to do. You be my coach, I'll be your bitch. I’m hooked.

One run does a Gazelle make.